Riding the Waves: Best Practices for Parents During Cultural Chaos
Generational Changes, Cultural Headwinds — and What To Do About It
Glenn Wishnew | Est. 5 minutes
The Currents
Generation Z, those aged 13-28, are at the forefront of a plate-tectonic culture shift. Their views on gender, government, patriotism and religion are widely divergent from generations past:
More than 50% believe there are more than two genders. i
3 out of 4 believe that the government’s “fundamental design and structure” should be torn down and rebuilt.ii
4 out of 10 believe that the founders of the United States are better described as villains than as heroes.iii
Only 60% believe in God – a dramatic decline from any previous generation ever recorded.iv
Of the share who believe in God, less than 40% believe without any doubt.
In the last twenty years, teenagers have become less religious in both belief and practice.
There are many contributing factors to this decline. For one, there has been a great de-churching among their parents during this same timeline. For another, teens today are less likely to participate in any group activities, religious or not.vi But the main difference I see today, however, is the volume of counter-Christian messaging that young people have access to.
School, home, church and local community used to exist in a symbiotic relationship. These 4 institutions established a comfortable habitat for Christian formation. Pastor Paul Carter puts it like this: “Parents, church, school and club were all working together and pulling in the same direction.”vii
Those 4 are no longer not guided by a similar moral vision. Teachers, coaches, pastors, parents and peers are offering different answers to a teenager’s fundamental questions. Add social media, Netflix, and peer relationships into this mix – and what emerges is an exhausting environment for a teenager to navigate. The potential outlets for negative messaging toward Christianity are everywhere.
Thus, many parents who try to disciple their kids are swimming against powerful cultural tides. The challenge feels overwhelming. How do you nurture Christian faith when the currents are stronger than before?
How to Navigate the Waves
Parents remain the most powerful influence in a child’s faith.
According to Christian Smith, the Notre Dame sociologist and expert on youth faith formation, “The empirical evidence is clear. In almost every case, no other institution or program comes close to shaping youth religiously as their parents do – not religious congregations, youth groups, faith-based schools, missions and service trips, summer camps, Sunday school, youth ministers, or anything else.”viii
Smith’s insight confirms what psychologists have said for many years: while teenagers might bristle at what you say, they’re still imitating what you do.
2. Live out your faith visibly and verbally.
Based on his research, Smith’s advice for Christian parents is simple: “believe and practice your own religion genuinely and faithfully. Children are not fooled by performances. They see reality.” We can extend Smith’s basic. insight into all of discipleship.
Much of the Christian life – the going to Church, the small-group studying, the praying, the volunteering, the hospitality – is caught, not taught. Paul tells the Corinthians to imitate him as he imitates Christ (1 Cor. 11:1). A question for reflection: if your kids imitated your discipleship perfectly, what would their faith look like?
The significance of modeling does not thereby undermine the significance of mentioning Jesus often in your home. Smith’s study concludes that parents who talk about their faith regularly through the week and explain its contours are more successful in transmitting that faith to their kids.
3. Place teenagers in ‘Christian soil’.
According to Cameron Cole, founder of Rooted Ministry, there is a “correlation between how many adults in Church know a teenager’s name outside of their parents” and the likelihood that a teenager will stick with Church as an adult.ix This is confirmed by my own experience as a teacher. My students are desperate to be seen and known by adults other than just their parents. If they view Church as the place where that need is met – (as it should be!) – then the love of Jesus will be more plausible to them because it was on display each Sunday.
Are we placing our kids in situations where that can take place? And are we, the Church, seeking to be adults whom God uses to draw a teenager to Himself?
4. Trust in the gospel’s goodness, truth, and beauty.
With the data on Gen Z’s religiosity, it is tempting to doubt the gospel’s power. Can we still believe that Jesus is the good, true, and beautiful answer to the next generation’s problems?
Yes we can. We must remember the Christian apologist Rebecca McLaughlin’s statement that “Christianity is the most racially, culturally, socioeconomically diverse movement in history. That is true globally, over the last two thousand years, and it's true in America today.”x The gospel’s cultural versatility has outflanked polytheistic Rome, atheistic China, and theocratic Iran. We shouldn’t start doubting it now.
Tim Keller’s booklet How to Reach the West Again lists 7 benefits Christianity offers over Secularism, the dominant alternative worldview today.
Christianity gives:
A meaning in life that suffering can’t take away but can even deepen.
A satisfaction that isn’t based on circumstances.
A freedom that doesn’t reduce community and relationships to thin transactions.
An identity that isn’t fragile or based on our performance or the exclusion of others.
A basis for seeking justice that does not turn us into oppressors ourselves.
A poise and peace not only in face of the future, but toward death itself.
An explanation for the senses of transcendent beauty and love we often experience.
Jesus of Nazareth has called people of all different backgrounds and social views into His Kingdom since Pentecost, and He will not cease doing so until the day He returns.
He’s going to build His Church (even through parents) and the gates of hell stand no chance.
ENDNOTES
i Jean Twenge, Generations:The Real Differences Between Gen Z, Millennials, Gen X, Boomers, and Silents—and What They Mean for America's Future (2023). pg., 350.
ii Ibid., 421:
iii Ibid., 421.
iv Ibid., 503.
v Thanks to Brad Wilcox and his team at the Institute for Family Studies for this chart. You can see more solid data on this here.
vi Twenge, Generations, 400-415.
vii TGC Article
viii See Smith’s excellent article “Keeping the Faith” published in First Things for a lot of the data backing the next two paragraphs.
ix I learned this insight from his excellent podcast episode with the As it is in Heaven crew.
x She says this often, as she should. But here’s one context for it.
© Glenn Wishnew | This article was first published in Lakelight Monthly, October 2023 Edition
